Shop Cops: Taste of Randolph

June 23, 2006 • Magazine

Shop Cops: Taste of Randolph

Fri, 2006-06-23 09:00

We still contend that this is one of the better Chicago street festivals fashion-wise. The worst part about the festival this year was the lack of “food” participants. What is it the organizers don’t get about the word ‘taste?’ Sorry, but you can’t taste a membership to Crunch Fitness now can you? Where have all the good restaurants gone? I was already irritated and HOT!

That being said, generally women looked pretty good! Props to you Chicago! There were a lot of great dresses which makes us very happy. We were contemplating showing you some of the good photos, but then we thought nah, the bad ones are so much more fun!

Let the games begin!

Disclaimer: This section is not for the humorless. It is not meant to be offensive. Please take it in the manner for which it is intended or express your democratic freedom by not looking.
Girl, we have some bad news for you. You don’t match. A green t-shirt that says something stupid and a plaid skirt with different shades of green? Molly? You’re in danger, girl.
Oh my God, she’s wearing overalls! I wasn’t aware you could still purchase these. In fact, I am pretty sure you can’t which means they must be relics from her youth or 1992. Either way, unless you are under 10, stay away from overalls (and pigtails, oh and braids).
“Karen, I was thinking that you, me and Deb should all wear the same thing to the Taste this year. You know those white Bermudas we all got at the mall a few weeks ago? Well, let’s wear those with a black sleeveless top ‘cause I know we all own at least one. OK? You on board with that? Cool, I’ll call Deb.” Barf. Citation for being BORING and queer.
I’m still trying to figure out the pink shoes with that dress. I’m coming up with nada. The bag doesn’t match either. Too bad because the dress isn’t half bad.
Work it. Own it! These two are ready and looking for action. Mainly your boyfriend/husband. Leave something to the imagination, will ya? Oh, and leave my man alone. Hey, I said stop looking at him!
A mess from head to toe. Let’s start with the pink polo shirt with a frilly skirt. Then let’s talk about last year’s boho skirt. Now let’s finish with the pink flip flops. Now let’s really finish with a few Millers because I have a headache.
Look Mom! No hands! I’m a big girl now! That dress is just awful. Not to mention those flat black things on her feet! Please, when you see those in DSW, keep walking.
Oh, it’s so hard picking the last one! Hmmmm, better make this a good one. Let’s see. Pretty good, could be worse… Tada! OK, so this is obvious, but we couldn’t resist. In bright summer lighting she was practically on fire! You have to admire someone who matches their hair to their clothing (but not the bag). Especially when that color is ORANGE!
See the Top Ten Summer 2016 Trends for Women Over 40

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