In order to get into the proper mindset for tonight’s award show, I thought I need to flex my style muscles, you know, train if you will. While I could focus on the best, the worst is so much more fun. Let’s take a look at year’s past Globe atrocities shall we?
Sela Ward Man I miss the show Sisters. I digress. Sela Ward wore this red
hot knot number to the 2002 Globes. It was a total miss. The massive volume, the exposed mid-section…I can’t even see her face, I’m staring at her abs! In fact, I remember shaking my head in disbelief. Please, it doesn’t matter if you are 60 and have rock-hard abs. We don’t shouldn’t see them!
Fran Drescher Holy mother of God! Carmen Miranda lives! So did probably bugs and other live creatures in that bouquet on her head. I’m sure she had a lipstick and keys stashed in there somewhere. I feel sorry for the poor shmuck who had to sit behind her that night in 1996.
Paula Abdul Poor Paula. She just can’t catch a break. She headlines everybody’s worst dressed list. She’s just too easy a target. Wouldn’t you fall over in shock if she actually just once wore something smashing and tasteful? This frilly mess she wore in 2005 obviously suffocated the air to her brain and clearly the lipids of her right breast. That must have been a long night fo sho.
Lara Flynn Boyle This woman terrifies me on a good day. This was not a good day in 1999. I remember the buzz that she was too thin. I agree. You could see her bones! She was also too boa-ed. Note to self: to camouflage anorexia, stay away from satin, shiny materials…especially in light colors.
Winona Judd Lisa Marie Presley channeling goth-girl in 2005. Always dour, her smile is really a smirk in a thinly veiled disguise. "See my whitchy-poo shoes? Aren’t they the cat’s ass?" She’ll either kick your yours or put a pox on you if you don’t agree.
Photos: people.comSee the Top Ten Summer 2016 Trends for Women Over 40